I Think That Just Happened.

That moment when you stop and think, "Did that really just happen to me or am I dreaming?". I hate it so much. I have been getting used to expecting the unexpected, but at times it sneaks up on me in new ways that I before, well, couldn't expect. Redundant, isn't it?
I've been stuck in situations, conversations, events where I wonder when the moment has passed, "That really did just happen. I'm not dreaming and I'm not going crazy after all!". School has been going well besides the fact that my Algebra grade might as well be in the toilet, but other than that one thing, things are looking up. I'm an Algebra grade and another major assignment in AP U.S. History from having nearly all A's across the board. I'm proud of myself to say that, because for the first time in my history of being at North Hills, I don't think I have ever been more enthusiastic towards the things that haven't happened yet.
Oh, and another random tangent to work off of, here. So, I'm around my friend. But, subliminally, it feels like my friend wants to say something, but doesn't. It drives me crazy when people can't say aloud to your face what you so badly are wishing and wanting to hear. I want to incorporate things like a boyfriend into my life, but it doesn't have to be exclusive. Someone that I can enjoy their company and humor, share my own, and be appreciated by them as well. None of this high school drama shit. That stuff gets old quick. Is it a bad thing to be hopeful? Is it a bad thing to believe in luck? And, on that note, is it a bad thing to be so happy around that person that being yourself is just so much easier?
I leave it to this friend I am speaking of for my recent activity on this blog, and to my energetic attitude in general. Like I've become the poster-child for the Energizer batteries, or something. I keep going and going, making plans that are several days and weeks away, even; but nevertheless, excited. To have something to look forward to is the best feeling in the world. Having a social life at all is the best feeling in the world, too.
I've recently gotten more used to the freedom that driving and managing my monthly allowance has given me. Budgeting is sometimes tricky because I pay attention to gas prices each month and dividing out where I want to spend and save my money: Ba-Humbug. I like being able to drive though, it gives me a feeling of independence and trust. Independence because the metroplex is now at my fingertips and underneath my rubber Goodwin tires. Trust because my grandparents give me the trust that they know I will be safe wherever I'm going, who I'm with, etc. Even when I'm moving around, I still call and text them periodically because, deep down inside, I want them to know that I'm making an effort to keep them involved and informed. That's really what parents want - to be included in your life as you get older day by day, year by year.
Speaking of years going by, I just realized that the most important test of my life in coming up this Saturday morning at Nimitz High School in So. Irving: The SAT. Cue the horror music and shrilly scream from a young woman. I feel prepared physically for this marathon-of-a-test, but I'm still a little nervous mentally on how this test will turn out and what my score will look like. I'm hoping that the Math and Writing Composite score will be enough to get me accepted into a public state school here in Texas, like TSU, UTA, or Texas Tech. No private schools like the University of Dallas or Baylor for me. We don't have that kind of money right now to even dream of paying for private school tuition. Amongst all the chaos of planning out the next year and following four years, I'm even considering North Lake College. Two years to get my Associates Degree, and then transfer over to a larger university when the time is right and I've become more accustomed to being and adult and taking college courses. I'm not scared of the impending transition in any way, just constantly wondering what the next 10 years are going to look like. I want to be successful and I want to make my parents proud. I want those things for myself so that I can accomplish things in my life that I have been wanting to since my childhood. Like, finding my sister Macenzie and supporting her if needed. Helping my grandparents get settled in Texas as they slowly move their belongings from Florida back to here. These next couple years are going to be great, the important thing now is keeping a steady head through it all and making sure I'm focused on what will help me be a better me in the long run.